Words of Wisdom from Prestige TV’s Most Affectionate Fathers
Don Draper, Mad Men: With a stiff drink and some fresh strange a man can suppress any emotion.
Logan Roy, Succession: Sometimes the fucking apples fall pretty fucking far from the fucking tree.
Martin “Marty” Hart, True Detective: Don’t try to solve no goddamned cold case-cum-statewide conspiracy with one of them handsome, brooding, nihilist-types. He’ll mount your old lady faster‘n you can whistle Dixie.
Walter White, Breaking Bad: Every man has a choice: shovel society’s shit, or free the monster lurking within.
Philip Jennings, The Americans: Life is nothing but a series of escalating nightmares, forcing you to debase yourself for causes you don’t believe in, destroy the few people you love, and exist in a state of pure misery and perpetual terror until you die, alone and afraid.
Frank Gallagher, Shameless: If it wasn’t for the liberals the people in this country would take some goddamned accountability for my behavior!
Tywin Lannister, Game of Thrones: The world is cruel. Malevolent. Violent. A father must teach his children — however limited they may be — to be shrewd, and cunning, and ruthless. Even if they kill him for it.
Stanislaus Valchek, The Wire: You ever heard of the “Peter Principle”? Toss in a little blackmail and some backstabbing and you got the Stan System.
Tobias Beecher, Oz: If they fool you once, shame on them. If they fool you twice, shame on you. If they fool you hundreds of times, in the most depraved and humiliating ways imaginable, you’re probably a sadomasochistic degenerate with unresolved childhood trauma.
Yoshii Toranaga, Shōgun: No flower is too precious. No friend is too loyal. No son is too sacred. For a righteous cause, a great man will sacrifice everyone but himself.
Tony Soprano, The Sopranos: You break your balls to support your family your whole fucking life and whaddya get for your troubles? Whacked. Fucking whacked.
